What is mindfulness?
We’re hearing a lot about mindfulness these days as if it is brand new concept. Mindfulness isn’t something new. It has been around for over 2000 years. Its roots come from Zen Buddhism. In the Zen Buddhist tradition, mindfulness is part of meditation. In fact, Zen means meditation. In our western culture we don’t have to use it for meditation although we certainly can. Mindfulness is achieved by being very aware of what is happening now. We aren’t worrying about what happened yesterday or what might happen tomorrow. We are paying close attention to what is happening right now. We aren’t judging what is happening but are keenly aware of it.
To help make mindfulness, clear I’d like to share some examples of what mindfulness is not. Mindfulness is not going to Mall and coming out later without any idea where the car is parked. It is not taking a shower and then not remembering if you washed your hair. It is not leaving one room to get something from another room and then not remembering what you were going after. These could all be explained by believing you are just having a senior moment but really age has nothing to do with it. The person doing these things is not living in the present moment and that person would be me.
Losing my car, not being sure I’ve shampooed my hair and forgetting what I went to get are examples of not being mindful. In the three examples, my mind was a million miles away from what I was actually doing. I actually missed opportunities to enjoy my present moment. If I had been mindful, I would have been in the present while I drove across town. I would have enjoyed my drive to Mall by being aware of everything around me in my present moment. My shower could have been a very pleasant experience with the good smells of the shampoo and body wash and the wonderful sensation of the warm water on my skin. In the present moment, I most likely wouldn’t forget what I went to the other room to retrieve.
From describing to you what mindfulness is not, you now have a clearer understanding of what it is. To review, mindfulness is being fully aware and involved in the present moment. There is no worry about tomorrow or regret about what happened yesterday.
How to Practice Mindfulness
Now that you are beginning to understand mindfulness here are some suggestions to start practicing it.
It might be a little difficult to just start being mindful but there are a lot of ways you can start training yourself. Everyday situations are a good way to get started. When you sit down to eat dinner, be very aware of how the food tastes and what it’s texture is. Notice how hot or cold the food it. Pay attention to how fast or slow you eat. Get yourself totally involved in the experience.
If you find yourself standing in a long line at a store, rather than getting mad or worrying about how late you are going to be. Start using mindfulness. Watch what is going on around you. Check out the feelings you are experiencing. Don’t judge them. Just let them come and go. You might even strike up a conversation with another shopper or play a game on your phone or use the time to plan the next day. It is OK to plan by the way. We all need to plan but when we are done planning we need to return to present moment.
When you are stopped at a red light you can pay attention to your breathing. Be aware of what is happening around you. Watch the other cars and the other people. Look to the left and right to observe but not judge what you see. If you feel impatience coming up for yourself just let it come into your awareness and then float away.
When brushing your teeth in the morning, be very aware of how you are doing it. Make sure each tooth is thoroughly brushed. Notice the taste of the toothpaste. Don’t judge it just notice how it feels and tastes in your mouth.
When you are driving to work in the morning, be present in your car. Don’t spend time worrying about what you think may happen during your day or how you really screwed up yesterday. Pay attention to the other cars. That’s always a great way to be both mindful and safe. Glance at interesting things on your way to work. Find beautiful yards with flowers and carefully mowed lawns or look for homes that in need of some attention. Notice people driving the same kind of car you drive. As long as you stay in the present moment you are practicing mindfulness.
Why do we want to do this? What are the benefits of being mindful?
There has actually been research conducted on the benefits of mindfulness. Being mindful significantly reduces anxiety. It is helpful dealing with depression, eating disorders and sleep disturbance. Mindfulness is beneficial in relationships because if a couple is committed to using mindfulness; there will be no need to bring up past hurts or past indiscretions. There will be no worry about what might happen. I recently worked with a client who felt she had made a serious error at her job. She was working alone at the time and nobody knew about the incident but her. She became so totally stressed out about the situation, she decided to seek counseling. She was full of fear and very worried. She thought she was losing her mind because of the mistake. She was afraid of making more mistakes. She was sure she would be fired. During her first session I introduced her to mindfulness. When she came in for her second session she was like a different person. She was calm, content and relaxed. That one technique had taken care of her problem. She concentrated on her job and stopped thinking about her mistake. She left the past in the past and the future in the future. I was really amazed how mindfulness had been so successful for her.
It has been clinically demonstrated that mindfulness can be useful for people with chronic or acute pain issues. In fact mindfulness helps for almost every type of pain including emotional pain such as fear, grief, anger, jealousy and shame. Mindfulness has been part of the AA program since its beginning. Of course, it isn’t called that but its there just the same.
Health benefits have been achieved such as lowered blood pressure, improvements to the immune system and the usual health benefits that accompany a lower stress level.
Mindfulness has increased performance levels in sports, and helped students study more efficiently.
In conclusion, you now have a clearer picture of what mindfulness is (and is not), you have been given some pointers on how to practice mindfulness in your daily life and you now know how using mindfulness can be benefitual. Give it a try. I think you will be amazed at the results. I have been very pleased at how much it has helped me and also how well it works for other people.